THE INNER LIGHT
by deetatarant
Summary: Someone is stealing people's souls: Season One.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: For anyone who knows Babylon V, the soul hunters take the souls away from people at the moment of death and store them in jars..... Torchwood finds a man who takes souls from the living.**

**Takes place season one, 5 weeks after the whole Lisa thing and before the Fearies.**

**THE INNER LIGHT : CHAPTER ONE**

His hands had locked around the steering wheel. He sat rigid, staring blankly out through the shattered remains of the windscreen. Freezing rain lashed at his face, soaked his shirt and bit into his skin, like needles. He was aware of all these things, the cold air, the radio, the deepness of the night and the fact that he just couldn't move. He was frozen as if he had stayed in a moment in time and the rest of it just slipped by without him. His ears hummed and felt hot in his head. That wasn't right. Warm liquid running through his hair when it should be cold, when it was so cold. He could see his hands clenching the arc of the steering wheel, he willed himself to dislodge them and still he could not. He was in a fuzzy world where light and dark began to merge into a mire of chaos.

"Ianto?"

Who was that?

"Ianto? Come on Ianto, can you hear me?"

Jack leaned in through the broken driver's door and called his name for a third time. To no avail. He carefully knocked away the rest of the fractured glass and grasped at Ianto's hands.

"Shit. Owen I'll need your help here."

It was difficult releasing Ianto's hands. Owen had climbed on to the crunched bonnet and assisted by clambering in through the absent windscreen. He and Jack exchanged worried glances as Owen gave his colleague a cursory exam.

"He's in shock Jack. How long has he been here?"

"I'm not certain, but a couple of hours at least. It was only because he was late that I checked the tracker. Why the fuck hasn't any one else stopped to help?" Jack was glancing along the length of the road. "Someone must have seen this?"

"You'd think....Look Jack I'm calling an ambulance, shock and hypothermia are already fairly advanced and he's almost non responsive."

Owen slid off the wreck and pulled out his mobile as Jack finally managed to wrench the door open. He was kneeling at Ianto's side and pulling off his greatcoat to cover him. Jack inspected for damage.

"He's not trapped, we can get him out."

"Don't even attempt to move him Jack, not until I've got his neck braced and the Paramedics are here, just cover him and keep talking to him." Owen yelled, as he ran back to the SUV for his trauma box.

Jack carefully released Ianto's seat belt and tucked the coat about his rigid body talking light heartedly the whole time. Then Owen was there neck brace in hand as he shooed Jack out of the way.

"Ok Ianto, I'm just going to put this on to keep your head still. The ambulance is on its way, mate. Don't worry you'll be fine." Owen slipped the collar on painfully aware that Ianto did not respond to his presence at all. Owen looked up into Jack's worried face.

"Jack search around, something must have caused Ianto to veer off the road. He may have hit someone or something."

Jack nodded, reluctantly he did as Owen asked, flashlight in hand. By the time he got back to the car wreck the ambulance had arrived and Ianto was being lifted on to gurney. A police car rolled up and the familiar figure of PC Davidson stepped out.

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Owen stood at Ianto's bedside perusing the medical charts in his hands. Jack had come back into the room and not even giving the patient a second glance his attention focussed on the medic.

"Well?"

Owen sighed dropping the charts down on to the bedside table. "He's suffering from exposure, bruising and he is in a state of catatonia. They've done a CT and found no abnormalities and since we brought him in last night he hasn't uttered a word or made any indication that he aware of his environment."

Jack finally looked to the young man lying on the pristine sheets, flat on his back staring at the ceiling above. Jack was unmoved, part of him was still so angry with Ianto that he didn't much care about his current state, but part of him was sad. Ianto had suffered enough over recent weeks.

"Conclusions?"

Owen shrugged, he too didn't appear particularly upset. "Some catastrophic mental breakdown, would be my best guess. He had no medical or psyche support after Canary Wharf, hiding Lisa for 6 months and then losing her. Well quite frankly I amazed he didn't top himself. Perhaps he's just lost it. He's a kid Jack whose seen some pretty horrible things, with no one to help him....Well he's probably better off in the state he's in."

Owen was watching Jack now. "It's not your fault Jack. Ianto was...."

"In love someone he couldn't bear to lose and none of us saw the pain he was in and now look. Maybe I should've just retconned him."

"I think the bullet would have been kinder."

Jack nodded, forced to agree. "I've notified his family that he was involved in an accident. His mother is on her way."

"Well, let her deal with him." Owen responded making to leave the room. "There's nothing we can do until he chooses to come out of this, if he ever does that is."

"That's it? We just write him off?"

"Jack...."

He glared at Owen. "I know what he did to us Owen. Believe me I am as angry as you and the others, but the bottom line is that we....I failed him..."

"Bollocks Jack. He brought this on himself!"

"By asking the Cybermen to destroy his life? We forget too easily what lead to the events of last month, he's human Owen, the same as you and I. You know how you felt after Katie? I don't imagine that he feels any less pain than you did."

Owen sucked in a steadying breath, knowing full well that Jack was right. "So what do you want me to do?"

"Let's give it a couple of days, see how he does. If there's no improvement we take him back to the Hub and run more detailed tests, our equipment there far outweighs what they have here. Can we at least make certain that there is nothing else we can do for him."

"No problem Jack. I'll do whatever it takes. He's still one of us after all."

"Thank you Owen."

Owen left the room and Jack turned his gaze back to Ianto who was completely unaware of the world. Cautiously Jack leant forward to look into his eyes and swallowed with shock when he realised that there was nothing there.

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The following morning felt strange. Jack stepped down from his office and noted the distinct absence of the aroma of brewing coffee. The Hub was still in darkness and Jack found himself shuddering at the realisation that Ianto's not being there felt wrong. It had been a welcoming thing, to rise each morning with the familiar sounds and smells of another presence, no matter how distant, to greet him in the earliest hours of the new day. Jack bit the thought back and went to make his coffee. Two hours later and the rest of the team straggled in. Gwen being the last to arrive, she straight away pulled a file out of her hand bag and took it up to Jack's office.

"I've got the preliminary report on the car accident, you'll want to see it Jack, it's odd."

Jack gestured for his newest recruit to sit, he eyed her appreciatively as she handed over the file.

Jack put it down and smiled at her. "So give me the shortened version."

Gwen dipped her head slightly and blushed for no good reason other than the fact that her boss was looking at her, she always felt like she was being undressed under his gaze.

"They think someone was in the car with him at the time of the accident. The windscreen was blown outwards, not in. They're speculating that he may have been attacked from behind, something, possibly a bullet caused the windscreen to shatter, he loses control of the car, it rolls then hits the tree. There were skid marks on the road lasting a couple of hundred yards that zig zag as if he lost control of the steering, it's also where they found a good deal of the glass. The forensics boys are taking the car apart today to look for further evidence."

Jack failed to hide his surprise. "Do we know where he'd been earlier that day?"

Gwen nodded. "Apparently to visit his sister's family and his mother, he'd left Abergavenny just after lunch time and was on his way presumably to work or home first maybe." She paused for a moment. "How was he yesterday Jack? Owen wouldn't say much."

"No serious injuries other than the fact he's in some kind of waking coma. He was like a rag doll yesterday, just lying there and when I looked into his eyes they were completely vacant." He shuddered at the memory.

"Nervous breakdown?"

Jack had no idea. "Owen thinks so. I'm not entirely convinced. I think if he were going to fall apart on us it would have happened by now."

Gwen frowned at him. "I think it happened the day Lisa got loose Jack. He seemed to be getting a bit better to me."

"He did?" Jack was curious. "He's talked to you?"

"No." She was shaking her head, dark hair reflecting the light as it moved, Jack noticed. "He's been talking to Tosh though. She's visited him at home a few times to check on him. I think she's rather fond of him."

"At least one of us has cared enough to bother. All I did was yell at him and threaten him with Retcon."

"Is that what you always do when things don't go your way?"

"How do you mean?"

Gwen decided to be blunt. "Well you've flirted with him relentlessly ever since I got here, perhaps your ego took a bit of a battering when it became obvious that it wasn't you he was interested in."

Jack opened his mouth to retort.

"We all ignored him Jack. You just saw him as an object to lust over. Truth is he's damn good at his job, so good that we don't notice until he's not here doing it. I don't know how you all managed before he arrived."

"Aren't you angry with him, for what happened?"

"No, how can you be mad at someone for being in love. I'm angry because he didn't trust us to help. I mean not me personally but I would've expected him to feel that he could talk to you. We never made him feel like of the team though did we? Never gave him a reason to trust us. I thought I was supposed to be the one here to keep us in touch with our humanity and I totally failed to see that something was amiss, and it was staring us in the face the whole time."

Gwen shifted in the seat enjoying the continued focus of Jack's gaze upon her.

"Hindsight is a wonderful thing." Jack leant back in his chair. "Come with me to the hospital later on, maybe he'll connect with you and wake up."

"Don't joke about this Jack."

"I wasn't. I was going to ask Tosh as well. Call the police too, get Ianto's car sent over we'll run our own tests on it."

Gwen took that as a dismissal and rose to her feet. "Will do. Have you spoken to his family?"

"Just to let them know he was in hospital, over the phone."

"We should talk to them. They were probably the last ones to see him before this happened."

Jack nodded. "Yeah you're probably right about that."

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"What do you mean he's been transferred?" Owen demanded of the nurse who was stood at her computer terminal with a very annoyed look on her face.

"He was moved to Providence Park. Dr Townsend signed the papers and the boy's mother paid for a private ambulance to take him there."

Owen glowered at the nurse. "That's a nut house!"

"Dr Harper, Providence Park is a psychiatric hospital. Mr Jones was in no condition to be left here, it's the best place for him under the circumstances and quite frankly we need the bed space for the physically injured and ill. Mr Jones has been handed over to the mental health team for his own benefit, now if you don't mind I'd like you to leave my ward. Torchwood or not you are in the way."

Owen turned on his heel and stomped through the swing doors swearing loudly. Jack, Gwen and Tosh were waiting in the corridor for him.

"What's going on?" Tosh uncharacteristically demanded.

"They've shipped him off to the funny farm. His mother organised it apparently, got him a place at PP."

"PP?" Jack asked.

"Providence Park." Gwen replied. "I guess we have to go there then."

Jack tapped on the steering wheel throughout the 20 minute journey, the absence of decent coffee was really getting to him. He swung the SUV somewhat carelessly into the driveway eliciting shrieks of protest from Owen and Tosh who were sat in the back of the vehicle. Braking hard outside the front of the recently converted stately home Jack was out of the car before the others had even undone their safety belts.

It was a beautiful room. It hadn't taken long for the staff to get Ianto settled into a chair by the window with a plaid blanket pulled over his lap. Mrs Emily Jones fussed about the vicinity of the chair adjusting the blanket and the cushions and patting her son's unresponsive hand. She chattered away to herself in an effort to calm herself and pulling up another chair she finally sat beside her son, well what was left of him. Emily had known since the terrorist attacks at Canary Wharf and the death of Lisa that her boy would be forever changed by the experience. When he returned to Cardiff a shadow of the bright and optimistic man she once knew she had spent each day living in fear, waiting for a call half expecting the police to be ringing her to identify the body of a suicide victim. So many times over the last few months he had called her and just cried down the phone, so many times she had felt him slip just that little bit further away. Emily squeezed his fingers, there was nothing there, no hint of acknowledgement, not even a recognition of another presence beside him. He sat his eyes unfocussed the light from the window on his pale face and he looked for all the world like a child with no soul. Emily cried, finally the last 24 hours sinking in when she realised her son was lost to her in spirit if not in body. It took her some moments to realise someone had come into the room. She looked up expecting to see a member of the hospital staff returning with the rheam of forms she knew she had to fill in. A man stood there, tall, his presence over shadowing everything in the sparse room, his handsome bright white smile failed to hide to look of surprise on his face.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to intrude." A hand was outstretched in greeting. "You must be Ianto's mother?"

The American accent sounded cheesy and too cheerful to her ears and Emily flinched at the sound of it, not accepting the offered hand, she simply nodded.

"And who are you?" Her voice a deep Welsh timbre was cracked with grief.

The hand was dropped along with the smile. "I'm Captain Jack Harkness, we spoke yesterday on the phone."

"I see, what do you want?" her hand remained protectively over Ianto's who was oblivious.

"I came to see your son. I'm trying to find out what happened to him."

"It was a car accident. Who are you?"

"Capt...."

"Not your name. What is it you do? Are you police?" She took in the old military coat and peculiar dress, no not police then. Torchwood, it had to be, Ianto's firm from London. "Are you from Torchwood?"

The American froze for a moment, looking mildly annoyed.

"Yes ma'am. I'm Ianto's superior officer."

Emily hitched in a breath and tears threatened again. "He said he wasn't working there anymore, because of Lisa, he was going to leave, the day of the accident. Oh God. Did you do this to him?"

A look of horror flashed across the Captain's face. "No." Aside from the accusation, he had had no idea that Ianto was planning on leaving them. "We found him in his car in this state, we don't know what happened, but the police believe that there may have been someone else involved." He took a pace forwards and smiled kindly.

Emily glared at him. "Get away from my son. Get out! Get out!" She rose to her feet and screamed at him tears flooding down her face. Then someone else came into the room.

"Jesus Jack what the hell is going on?"

Owen was confronted by a screaming older female version of Ianto standing furiously protecting her son. Owen grasped hold of Jack's arm and pulled him back out of the room closing the door behind them. Jack was too stunned to respond, he hadn't for one moment considered the impact on Ianto's family, wasn't used to dealing with people on the outside who mattered.

"What the hell did you say to her?" Owen demanded.

"Nothing I...She just."

Gwen stepped forward taking in Jack's dazed expression.

"Was it Ianto's family?"

"His mother, she's pissed." Owen replied. "I'm going to talk to the doctor. Jack stay away from Ianto until his mother is out of range!"

Some one seemed to have anticipated Owen's next move.

"Dr Owen Harper?" A soft Welsh accent.

The torchwood team turned and faced a white coated young woman with copious amounts of red hair and in the early stages of pregnancy.

"Are you lot from Torchwood?"

Jack was scowling. "Does all of Wales know we're here?"

A hand was outstretched. "Hello, I'm doctor Rhianna Kelly. Please tell me you're Torchwood."

Jack shook her hand taking in the wide green eyes and rose coloured cheeks against a pale skin, she looked oddly familiar.

"I'm Ianto's sister, and one of the resident clinical pyscologists here. I would like to talk to you."


	2. Chapter 2

**THE INNER LIGHT: CHAPTER 2**

"So what would you like to talk to us about?" Jack was in flirt mode straight away, she was as cute as her younger brother and ignoring the fact that she was pregnant.... Jack focus. His conscience nagged. This was Ianto's sister. Ianto his junior employee the one who was in serious trouble, and who was also his responsibility. Rhianna met his look with one of open annoyance.

"Stop eying me up, in case you hadn't noticed I'm spoken for and don't appreciate being leered at."

Tosh and Gwen actually turned away and sniggered at this. Jack and Owen simply gaped, then Owen did something quite unexpected and rather embarrassing for Jack.

"You should see the way he looks at your brother love."

All eyes fell on Jack and he hid behind one of his patented grins. "Shall we take this somewhere a little less public?"

Rhianna nodded not entirely shocked by Owen's comment. Ianto had always turned heads, her little brother had never paid much attention to it himself, but Rhianna and her mother had teased him relentlessly through his teens over it. She smiled at the unbidden memory.

"My office, just you please Dr Harper."

Jack opened his mouth to protest.

"I'm certain the good doctor can tell you what I tell him, if he thinks it is relevant. I have my patient's confidentiality to protect. I'm sure you understand Captain." She responded firmly. Jack could see the Jones' determination in her eyes and he nodded.

"Of course, but first we'd like to take a look at Ianto without your mother getting upset again."

Rhianna shook her head. "Come back later. Mam needs time and quite frankly you're requirements are not important enough for me to disturb her."

Once again Jack opened his mouth to speak.

"Don't even think it Captain. Our whole family has been through enough because of Torchwood. If this turns out to be anything to do with it you'll have me to answer to and believe me you do not want to mess with me."

Jack acknowledged the honesty in the threat, she was obviously as upset as her mother was, not that she was any threat to him of course.

"Doctor, we need to see Ianto in order to run some tests. Trust me we are not to blame for what happened and we're assisting the police with their own investigation." That wasn't quite true.

"Like I said, come back later, and Dr Harper will be the only one of you to be granted access. I'm sorry Captain, it's that or nothing."

Jack nodded and turned to Owen. "You got everything you need to run some scans?"

"Yes."

"Ok, we'll go. When you're done here get a cab back to the Hub."

Jack reluctantly left, Gwen and a disappointed Tosh trailing behind.

TWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTTWTW

Owen perched himself on the edge of a chair as Rhianna settled herself behind a cluttered desk. She deftly pulled her hair into a bun at the back of her head threading a pencil through the thick tresses to keep in place.

"Coffee, Dr Harper?"

Owen had to smile, she sounded just like Ianto. "Only if it's as good as your brother's."

"Can't promise that." She got up and went to her coffee machine which sat on top of a grey filing cabinet.

"You mind me asking? You seem very young to be a qualified doctor."

He heard her laugh. "Just qualified, started here 2 months ago, I passed my A levels at 16 and went straight to Cambridge. Ianto was there too studying English Lit. I was smarter of the two of us, but he was always the wiser...Shit I'm talking past tense, I can't believe it."

She hauled in a breath and turned round proffering a mug. Owen took it.

"Ianto doesn't strike me as being very bright."

Rhianna resumed her seat. "Oh he is. He struggled at school though, mostly due to Tad's death. He didn't have friends either. I think university liberated him a bit, he has an enquiring mind, well he had. Canary Wharf turned him into someone I don't know anymore."

"Did he talk about it?"

Rhianna sipped on her coffee and sighed. "He stopped talking full stop. He'd phone Mam sometimes and before he could get a word out he'd be crying, but he never talked. He's become distant, you can be sitting in a room with him and you know he's millennia away, not taking it in. He misses Lisa and won't let anyone help him with the PTSD."

Owen sat there feeling decidedly uncomfortable. His patient, his responsibility and like Jack he had failed him monumentally.

"You wanted to discuss something." Time to drag themselves back to the problem.

"Yes." She slid four folders across the desk toward him. "Ianto's the fourth patient to be admitted here over the last 28 days in a catatonic state. Statistcally speaking that is unsual, but I did some digging, because I like to know my patients as much as I can. There's no connection as such. It's just odd, they are all trauma victims first and foremost, one survived an attempted suicide, one was mugged, the other had a seizure during her last dose of Radio therapy. I am clutching at straws to help them, but this is personal now. My brother is only 24 years old I do not want him spending the last 60 years of his life in this place. Right now I am willing to do anything, hell I even considered a priest this morning when Ianto first got here. I know Torchwood investigates odd things, they tried recruiting me at the same Ianto joined them but I turned them down, didn't like Yvonne Hartman...I just want you to look into it, please."

Owen took the folders. "Ok, let me look at these other patients and then Ianto. We'll do our best to find out what happened."

TWTWTTWTWTTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTW

Gwen closed her mobile phone and sighed, another argument with Rhys. She stuffed the offending item into her handbag and caught sight of Jack watching her from the overhead boardroom as she did so. She offered a faint smile and Jack returned the gesture, but there was something missing from it this time, like it wasn't really her he was smiling at. She turned on hearing the roller door and Tosh and Owen came in both of them in discussion. Jack was down there with them a moment later.

"Stuff to report?"

Both of them nodded.

"Ok grab yourselves a coffee then we'll convene in the boardroom"

Toshiko kicked the meeting off. "I went over Ianto's car. The only thing I can find in addition to the police examination was this." She turned to the plasma screen displaying a fluctuating graph of pulsing blue light. "It's energy, reads almost the same way that the energy coming off that ghost machine produced, but there are differences in the high end frequencies..."

"That looks like an EEG read out from a brain scan." Owen commented getting up and taking a closer look at the screen. "That shouldn't even be possible."

Tosh nodded. "We'll emotional energy sounded a bit far fetched, but I've seen this before. There was a study a few years ago run by Torchwood One into the effects of outer body experiences. They were experimenting with detaching people's minds from their bodies, the project was shut down."

Jack nodded. "Archie and I both lodged formal complaints with UNIT at the time. I think it was UNIT that intervened, but I am not sure. It was hushed up very quickly and quietly as I recall. This was before Ianto joined Torchwood right?"

Tosh shook her head. "Actually Jack he's listed as one of the test subjects, but he doesn't know it because they Retconned him once the research was shut down."

"So what, this thing's come back in some way?"

Toshiko shook her head. "I don't think so Jack. There's DNA evidence to suggest that this man was in Ianto's car at the time of the accident." She brought up a slide of an Asian man on to the corner of the screen.

"Dr Samir Patil, he was one of the research assistants on the project, listed as missing presumed dead after the battle of Canary Wharf."

"So, he's done something to Ianto?" Gwen piped up.

"It looks that way." Owen responded. "I don't think Ianto is the only one either. I examined three other patients as well as Ianto, the energy readings were off the scale on all four of them. However Ianto is the only one with any connection to Torchwood. Each patient had a very distinctive mark in the middle of their chests. I initially didn't see Ianto's because of the bruising from the steering wheel and quite frankly because I wasn't looking, but it's there. Three tiny puncture marks. I've taken tissue samples from Ianto as he's the most recent 'victim', but it may be a couple of days before I can give you any results."

Jack heaved out a sigh. "Any chance we could be barking up the wrong tree here? I mean could it be a simple case of a nervous breakdown?"

"It could be Jack, but this is Torchwood, so it hardly seems likely. At the very least if Dr Patil did do this then Ianto was deliberately targeted. We know he was in Ianto's car, may have even been injured himself in the crash...."

Gwen got up. "I'll start calling round, see if anyone's shown up with injuries that would correlate with this, he may have gone to an NHS walk in centre or AnE." She left the room taking a last look at Jack as she went. He was completely distracted.

"Tosh, pull up everything you have on record about the research program, see what you can match to your own findings, Owen do the same. I suspect we're going to have try to locate Patil. Tosh lets work on an assumption that whatever has been done to Ianto is reversible."

"And what will you do?"

"I'm going back to Providence Park to see if Rhianna will release Ianto into our care."

Owen's eyebrows climbed into his hairline. "Good luck mate."


	3. Chapter 3

**THE INNER LIGHT PART 3**

For the first time in his life Samir wasn't alone. He'd found a voice, someone who could reach into his soul and ease his torment and calm his chaos into order. The Jones boy had always shown promise. His research professor back at Cambridge had found him years ago, groomed him for Torchwood and Ianto Jones had been only too willing a volunteer. A young man whose life was so ordered and controlled the absolute physical opposite to chaos itself, a rare and beautiful gift. Finally, Samir had found him again. So not all had been lost when the Cybermen came. He had welcomed them, uncluttered by human emotion, but too cold, not calm, not Ianto Jones. He would keep the boy forever close by, the guardian he needed in order to face the world, the one who could protect him..... Carefully Samir placed the glowing sphere on the shelf and caressed it reverently. There were many of them now, hundreds of trapped souls. He had found them all in his search for the one that could bring him peace. He slumped on to the chair that was sat surrounded in a square of shelves in his converted garage. His eyes shuttered down and he listened to all the voices around him, some of them so old now. He had no idea. After the research project had shut down he had salvaged as many as he could before UNIT got their hands on the rest and of course he had the device, not that he would use it again. His hands fell to his ribs unbothered by the pain and his shallow breathing. The car accident had been unfortunate, but he was healing now, they were making him better.

Jack Harkness decided on a more sombre approach as he entered Providence Park for the second time that day. It was 7pm now and he was hoping that Ianto's mother had gone home. Having phoned ahead Ianto's sister Dr Kelly was waiting for him inside the main entrance, her pretty face drawn with worry. Jack couldn't help but smile, she was so Ianto, so damned attractive, like her brother.

"Dr Kelly."

"Captain. Mam's having a sleep in my office, so you can see Ianto if you'd like." She seemed much calmer than she had earlier that day her hands resting lightly on her swollen abdomen.

Jack gestured. "When's it due?"

"In three months. Little sod's been kicking like mad this afternoon."

Jack smiled in sympathy remembering what that felt like. "Can we talk?"

"Come on we can use the staff room."

They sat opposite one another on plastic chairs, a seventies formica table between them. Rhianna pulled her hair out of its bun and shook it loose the tresses brushing the table top. Jack had to concentrate really hard on not brushing it away from her face.

"We think we know what happened to Ianto."

Her eyes widened. "Pray tell."

Jack offered an awkward smile. "It's going to sound a little far fetched."

"I'm a big girl, in every sense of the word." She rubbed the kicking baby bump again. "Brat."

Jack reached out his hand. "May I?"

Ianto's eyes were staring right back at him. "Yes, if you like."

He gently rested his large hand across the bulge and felt movement under his palm through the fabric of her cotton shirt. A real smile reached his face, fired in his eyes and Rhianna caught sight of it and she smiled back.

"That's one feisty baby." Jack with drew his hand. "Thank you."

Rhianna blushed, now she understood what her brother had meant. '_ my bloody boss Rhi, always makes me blush, I feel like a naughty school kid around him.'_

"So Captain, my brother?"

"We think he has been exposed to a device that can remove his soul." He waited for a re action, what he got surprised him completely.

"You know that's what Mam said, his soul is gone. I wouldn't like to go into how... you obviously know...can you fix him?"

Jack inhaled a long breath. "I don't know. Until we find the man that did this and the equipment he used...."

"You know who did it?"

"Possibly, we have a good lead. It's just a matter of finding him, which may not be so easy. My team are working on it now. I need to take Ianto back to our HQ. We have to study what's happened to him in order to put it right."

They looked long and hard at one another.

"You are telling me the truth aren't you? This isn't something Torchwood has done to him is it?"

Jack held her gaze. "Actually it is, though not us. The London branch. He was experimented on with some alien technology. The person who attacked him the other day was part of that original research project. I believe he's continuing with his tests. The original project was shut down due to protests from my office and the military."

Rhianna's hand went to her mouth. "Ianto never mentioned any tests."

"His memories of the events were erased, he doesn't know..."

"Jesus, what kind of sick people are you?"

Jack hitched a breath the legacy of Torchwood One like a noose around his neck, "Not us. The London office. I promise you we don't operate like they did, I won't allow it. Ianto's a valued member of my team and I want to help him, I can't do that without your co-operation."

"He won't be a member of your team Captain because once he's fixed he's leaving Torchwood, even if I have to commit him to do it. His life has been torn apart by you people."

Jack placed his hands flat on the table in front of him. "Right now Rhianna, all I want to do is put this right. When he is recovered we'll discuss his future, with him. I can't afford to lose him. He's..."

"My brother and soon to be an uncle and I want my children not to have to go his funeral before they've even got to know him. 27 people walked out of Canary Wharf alive out of how many? A thousand? He is damaged Jack, he needs to heal and needs to leave Torchwood in order to do that."

"Can we at least agree to disagree for now?"

Rhianna hesitated, she could see genuine concern there. "Yes. You can take Ianto, but I am coming with you that's not negotiable."

Jack sighed.

"I mean it."

"Alright." Jack said, wondering what Retcon would do to an unborn child.


	4. Chapter 4

**THE INNER LIGHT: PART FOUR**

Owen did a double take as Jack stepped in through the roller door. Ianto was at his side and Dr Kelly on Ianto's other side her younger brother's hand tightly clasped in hers. Owen leapt to his feet and helped her guide her vacant brother through the door. It was the strangest thing to see, Ianto being lead, sheep like across the Hub and down to the autopsy bay. Rhianna didn't take in her surroundings as she was completely focussed on Ianto. Owen was just wondering how Jack had managed to prize their Welsh Tea Boy from the clutches of the Jones family. Gwen and Tosh watched the spectacle in horrified silence as this was the first time they had seen Ianto since the Lisa incident. Tosh's hand went to her mouth but she got up and followed them to the autopsy bay and went straight to Ianto's side. Rhianna was rather shocked when the petite Japanese girl embraced her catatonic brother.

"Don't worry Ianto, we'll fix this." Toshiko assured him even though he did not respond. Rhianna smiled faintly, at least there was someone here who seemed to care about him. Tosh stepped away and offered Rhianna a look of concern and sympathy.

"I'm Toshiko, Ianto's friend."

Rhianna met her look a trifle stonily. "Not his co-worker then?"

Tosh was a little taken aback. "Friend first." She left the bay. Only to be replaced by Jack who was proffering a glass of water. Rhianna shook her head.

"No thank you, knowing Torchwood it's probably poisoned."

Jack shrugged and put the glass on the counter and went to help Owen get Ianto settled on to the exam table.

"So Owen anything with the initial tests you did this morning?" Rhianna asked eyeing the glass of water with suspicision. Owen glanced at Jack for guidance before responding and Jack gave him a nod.

"Tell her everything. We'll deal with the protocols later."

Owen understood, Retcon then, but she was preganant, he'd need to check whether that was safe. Ianto was settled lying flat on his back still in the hospital overalls, hands limp at his sides. Owen pulled up the cot sides not trusting his patient to simply roll off the couch, he avoided looking into Ianto's eyes.

"Blood work confirms presence of a drug named R381. It matches with the stuff they were using at T1 when they were running the experiments. I have no idea what it is supposed to do, part sedative definitely. I'd suggest it's designed to induce the state required to remove whatever it is they took from him. The drug is concentrated in the tissue around the puncture marks on his chest." Owen was pulling out various pieces of equipment as he spoke. Rhianna stood there frozen in fascination.

"I'm going to run deep tissue scans and a detailed analysis of his brain activity, try and get a better picture of the extent of the damage."

"And this stuff?" Rhianna gestured at the equipment.

Owen gave her a slightly smug look. "Let's just say it's better than anything the NHS have got."

"Can I help?"

Owen once again looked at Jack, who nodded. "Sure."

Jack left them to it, there was nothing more he could do down there so he went to Tosh and Gwen for an update, just as Gwen let out a whoop of joy.

"I've got him! I found him Jack, he's living in south London."

Tosh and Jack were at her side immediately. Gwen was grinning happily and even more so when she found Jack's hand rested firmly on her shoulder.

"Good work Gwen. Looks like we'll have to go out there and pick him up. Tosh will you have any idea about what gadgets he's using?"

Tosh nodded, "I'll know what to look for, not certain I'll be able to use it though."

"Fine." Jack dropped his hand from Gwen and went to the steps that lead to the autopsy bay. "Owen, Gwen has located Patil, we're going to have to go to London to pick him up."

Owen's head snapped up and he narrowed his eyes at Jack. "Why not get UNIT to do it?"

"Because I don't trust them and if they get their hands on that device we'll never see it again and Ianto will be stuck like that. Gwen will stay here with you, Tosh and I will head out."

Gwen was pouting behind him but she kept her mouth shut as Jack swung round to face her. "Gwen." His voice lowered dramatically. "I need you to pull up all the information we have on the effects Retcon. I will have to dose Rhianna before this is over and I want to be certain her baby doesn't come to any harm. Use the computer in my office."

Still pouting she nodded. "Of course."

As per usual Jack broke the speed limit all the way to London. It was 2 am when they finally arrived at Patil's Wimbledon house. The brick building was in darkness pulling out his Webley and a set of skeleton keys and without considering etiquette Jack let them in Tosh two paces behind with her own weapon raised. They searched the house room by room but it was deserted and from the smell lingering and the mess in the kitchen no one had cleaned it for months. From the kitchen they burst through a door into the garage, weapons ready, blinking in the strong light. Jack froze at what he saw unable to comprehend what he was looking at. Tosh halted in mid stride a horrified look on her normally composed face.

"Oh, god How many of them are there?"

Jack frowned. "Tosh?"

She edged forwards past her leader moving in to the room filled with shelves laden with glowing spheres. She faced Jack.

"This is awful Jack. Those things they're containers for the....for the souls that have been stolen."

Jack baulked. "You're certain?"

She nodded then turned back walking cautiously forwards. "I found Patil Jack."

He was behind her looking over her shoulder at the man sitting quite obviously dead in the chair surrounded by shelves. Jack leant forward to double check anyway, the body was cold and looking strangely peaceful. As Jack straightened up he was hit by flood of dizziness and an explosion of sound in his head. He dropped the Webley hands going straight to his temples.

"Oh shit!" He sank to the concrete floor.

"Jack?" Tosh knelt at his side and watched worriedly as he hauled in steadying breaths, his face white and sheened with sweat. He managed to look at Tosh.

"I can hear them Tosh. I can hear them all." It was like an incessant wailing slamming straight through his skull, Jack thought he was going to faint and it took all of his will power to get himself under control. "Need to get out of here for a moment."

Tosh helped him to his feet and he staggered back into the kitchen gaining instant relief. Tosh was at his side.

"You Ok Jack?"

He nodded. "Yeah. I just need to prepare myself before I go back in there. Go in Tosh find everything you think you'll need."

"What about you?"

Jack grinned at her. "Ianto will be in one of those things, I have to find him." He got to unsteady feet with Tosh's help but he waved her off. "I'm fine. Come on let's get to work."

Tosh searched around the room, steadfastly avoiding coming into contact with any of the shelves for fear of dislodging their contents. She felt horribly uncomfortable able to perceive a feeling of sadness and fear washing over her in great waves. On inspection it became clear that there were many hundreds of the glowing globes every single one a different colour with it's own luminessance and other colours swirling around inside them, but still she couldn't bring herself to look more closely. She finally found what she was looking for.

Jack re entered the room rather more slowly, needing a moment to compose himself, his telepathic barriers fully in place.

Owen systematically ran his tests and Rhianna watched from Ianto's side, his cold lifeless hand clasped tightly in hers. Owen tut tutted to himself, making notes and talking to himself as he studied the data. His tests took well over two hours and finally with the last one complete he realised just how tired Rhianna was so he went to fetch her a chair to sit on. It was obvious she had no intention of leaving her brother's side. Rhianna took the seat with a smile of gratitude.

"Thank you Dr Harper." She got comfortable rubbing her baby belly with one hand and Ianto's still arm with the other. Her face was drawn with exhaustion.

"I'm going to make some coffee, you want some?"

"Can I trust you?"

Owen frowned. "Anyone one would think....."

Rhianna glared at him. "I know all about Torchwood Owen. They tried recruiting me, remember? Ianto's told me about your pills for selective memory, making people disappear. Do you know what it does to a man asking him to deal with things like that every day? Asking him to shoot his own girlfriend?" She paused. "He told me about that too. He was terrified you'd steal his memories of Lisa. At least when he's better he'll never have to come back here again."

"So he is planning on leaving us then?"

"What choice does he have? His life is damaged enough. I won't let him come back here."

Owen snorted. "Hardly your choice love."

She shot him the filthiest look. "Do not call me love, and it is my choice. If I have to protect my brother then I will and keeping him from this place is top of my list of things that need to be done." Rhianna returned her gaze to Ianto. "He's seen too much, he's just a baby."

Owen paused with a scowl on his face. "That 'baby' managed to sneak a partially converted Cyberman into our basement, he's responsible for the deaths of two civilians and nearly all of us, be assured Dr Kelly that Tea Boy is as grown up and dangerous as the rest of us!"

"Tell me something Dr Harper as his doctor did you offer him any counselling after Canary Wharf? Did you suggest any treatment for his PTSD?"

Owen glowered at her. "Fuck you! You're welcome to take him, he's bloody useless anyway." He strode out of the autopsy bay shaking with rage and went to make himself a mug of coffee. Gwen was watching him, having heard the argument, she silently had to admit that she wouldn't be unhappy if Ianto did leave them, he always gave her the creeps.

Rhianna sighed and wiped angrily at the tears on her cheeks, god she was hormonal at the moment, she pulled out her mobile from the pocket of her trousers and sent a text to her husband explaining why she was still at work.

AN: Am about to change broadband providers so apologies for the delays that are inevitable.....next installment as soon as I can and **thank you** for reading and reviewing!


	5. Chapter 5

**THE INNER LIGHT: PART 5**

Tosh checked off the items she had retrieved against the list that she had compiled back at the Hub. Her search had uncovered three devices and a rack of drugs from the fridge in the kitchen as well as the computers, hard drives, discs and memory sticks from all around the house. When she was certain she had everything she needed Jack helped her load it all into the back of the SUV. They made their way back to the garage Jack steeling himself for the next part of their task, to locate Ianto, or whatever part of him it was that had been stolen from him. Jack stood in the middle of the room surveying the hundreds of orbs with a bewildered look on his face, his arms hanging limply at his sides.

"There are so many Tosh it's so confusing in here."

She stood at his side. "How do you want to do this?"

"I'll go into the kitchen bring them out to me one at a time."

"Ok, these ones have no dust on them, they look more recent. We can start there." She glanced down at the corpse as she spoke. "Do you suppose he could hear them the way you do?"

Jack gave her an unhappy look. "If he could then why imprison all these people like this, it's sick."

Tosh had no answers, like so many legacies of Torchwood One's mistakes and crimes all they could do was try to minimise the damage.

"Why Ianto?"

"I don't know, maybe there's something in this guy's notes about that. Maybe during the original experiments Ianto did something the others couldn't, perhaps he has some gift that even he doesn't know about." Jack hauled in a long breath. "Come on let's get this over with." He left the room relieved to get into the stinking kitchen. He pulled out one of the dining chairs and sat on it. "Ok Tosh, ready when you are."

Toshiko looked anxiously at the rows of glowing orbs, wondering at this point whether or not it was actually safe to handle them, they appeared to be made of glass, but the energy inside could easily penetrate it for all she knew. She pulled a pair of protective gloves from her satchel and put them on. Reaching out gently she lifted up the first one, it's brightness intensified and for a moment she thought she was going to drop it. Nothing else seemed to happen. Jack called her from the kitchen, so with globe held at arms length she took it out to Jack. He was sat with eyes closed as he cautiously reached his mind toward Tosh. She felt a strangely familiar warmth brush at her conscience that made her smile.

Jack smiled when Tosh came back, the second presence with her was definitely female, Jack liked the smell of flowers that came with her. He touched the smooth surface of the orb, it was warm. He tried to convey some comfort as he shook his head at Tosh.

"Not him."

Tosh took it back and brought out another one.

It felt as if it had gone on for hours. So many souls, and so much loneliness and fear. Each time it became harder to reach out without recoiling in discomfort, without hissing his own frustrations and without crying every time they came across a child. Tosh had counted 86 at this point when it was obvious that Jack needed to stop and rest. He sagged against the cluttered table resting his head on his arm.

He was crying.

Tosh edged forwards and gently rubbed circles over his back.

"There's so many children. Why would anyone do that to a child? I'm sorry I need a minute."

"It's ok. We'll find him Jack. If it works making him right again, maybe we can help some of these people too."

Composing himself Jack straightened up and smiled a smile at Tosh that completely failed to reach his eyes. "Yeah, ok. Let's keep going."

Seven more times, each one infinitely harder than the last as Jack was weakened considerably by his efforts. Reluctantly he took a bluish one that Toshiko held out to him. It was markedly different to the rest, cold to touch for a start. He yelped and withdrew his hand as if electrocuted.

"I found him Tosh, it's Ianto." Biting at his lower lip he took the orb in both hands and gripped it firmly opening his mind up fully trying to emanate calm. The sphere brightened in his grasp and Jack was grinning.

"He knows it us. Tosh take the gloves off, feel this."

Tosh ripped off her gloves and tentatively lay her fingertips over the globe in Jack's hands. She looked straight at Jack tears welling in her eyes at the flood of sadness that hit her, then something much deeper reached her, warmth and relief.

"Jack, I do believe he's happy to see us."

Careful to maintain his grip Jack pulled Tosh into a hug. "Come on I think we need to get him home."

After locking up the house they went out to the SUV. Jack already had his mobile out and was talking to Owen to update him on the situation. At the vehicle he turned to Toshiko.

"You mind driving?"

"I was going to anyway. You look exhausted and you can rest in the back and keep Ianto company on the way home."

"You've definitely got everything you need?"

"Yes, Jack."

Within minutes of getting on the road, Jack was asleep across the back seat, the sphere cradled against his chest under his great coat. Tosh was smiling into the rear view mirror, no matter what Ianto had done in the past she would be very glad to have him back amongst them and she was sure Jack would be too.

Rhianna awoke to someone shoving at her shoulder and sucking in her startled breath she sat up and stretched.

"Here, drink this and it isn't poisoned. You're pregnant you shouldn't be going so long without food and drink." Owen proffered a mug of what looked like tea and grinned rather tiredly. "There's a couch up there with a table with some breakfast on it. Go on, today could be a long day."

"And yesterday wasn't?"

Owen shrugged.

"Thank you Owen."

Owen was already checking Ianto's vitals again. Rhianna's gaze followed him to the focus of her worries.

"He looks so peaceful." She murmmerred.

"Yeah, probably better off, I'd say."

Rhianna nodded absently as she gently brushed at her brother's hair with her fingers. "You may be right there. Did you sleep last night?"

"Yeah grabbed a couple of hours on the couch after you dozed off. Jack and Tosh are on their way back, should be here soon."

"Will they be able to help him?"

"Hopefully, yes."

"I'm going to have my breakfast then. Is there a bathroom around here?"

"Yep, I'll show you."


	6. Chapter 6

**THE INNERLIGHT 6**

It had taken a good deal of cadjoling to get Captain Harkness to allow her to stay at the Hub by her brother's bedside. Gwen had run her home to collect an overnight bag with some fresh clothes and brought her back. Owen was quietly relieved to have Rhianna there because she was taking over the task of monitoring Ianto's vitals whilst the rest of the team worked on how to get 'Ianto's soul back into his body'. Tosh spent the next few days pouring over Patil's notes, and going over everything she could find on his computers. Owen got to analysing the drugs they had retrieved from Patil's house and studying the orb which was now safely stowed in Jack's office in the safe. Gwen and Jack returned to London with a Van bringing back all of the orbs in padded storage containers and Patil's body. Before any of them realised it 72 hours had slid by without incident. Jack finally called everyone into the boardroom for a progress report, leaving Rhianna to remain with her brother in the autopsy bay.

Tosh began the briefing, pulling off her glasses, the frustration in her face plainly evident.

"Patil kept a detailed database of all the test subjects from Torchwood One and his subsequent victims. For each individual there is a clinical chart and every stage of the procedures performed was logged. I found the original data on Ianto. He was told he was testing a new anti virus treatment, like in a clinical trial, but for alien viruses. He was retconned after each session. It's pretty creepy Jack. He was given drugs in varying doses initially until they found the right combination used to induce a state of seizure, like having an epileptic fit. Once in that state, the three devices were used to extract him. These two...."

She held up two identical items which resembled two smooth silver eggs. "They are taped into the hands and this positioned close by. They are precisely identical in size, shape weight and mass. I have no idea what actually happens beyond that. These objects are completely resistant to our scans. I have run them through every single piece of diagnostic equipment we have and I cannot penetrate the surface of these objects. The only reading is a very low frequency sound wave that's beyond the human hearing range, it's continuous with no fluctuation or pulse that I can detect." She put the items down on the table. "From reading the case notes, it appears that there were three test subjects of special interest, Ianto being one of them. It seems that he was able to communicate with people on the outside...there's not much though because the testing was stopped at that point. The other test subjects, a total of 38 people are all listed among the Canary Wharf dead."

Gwen was figiting uncomfortably in her seat. "These guys in London sound like they deserved what happened to them." She commented.

Jack silently had to agree with her.

"Not all of them Gwen." Owen remarked rather more harshly than he had intended.

"So why were they doing these experiments?" Gwen demanded.

"Because they could? Because Yvonne Hartman was trying to get one up on UNIT? Fuck knows!" Owen snapped.

Jack raised his hands to silence them. "They were trying to get people to be able to migrate from their bodies of their own free will, for the purpose of covertly gathering intelligence."

Owen, Gwen and Tosh all gaped at him.

"You knew?"

Jack nodded. "It's why I made a formal protest. I could see where it was going. We're getting off track here. Ok Tosh how do we reverse what's been done to him?"

Tosh looked worriedly around the conference table. "Drug induced fitting, then allowing the devices to do their work, so far as I can tell. Jack, during the tests Ianto was the only one to have been successfully reinstated, the others were still separated from their bodies when they died at Canary Wharf."

"Do we know why he was the only one?"

She looked at Owen. "Ianto rates pretty highly on the Psi tests that all of Torchwood One staff were put through. He was recruited direct from university after helping out a fellow student with some mind reading tests for her dissertation. He's classed as empathic, rather than having any telepathic ability, just an uncanny ability to predict people's needs and moods. It was concluded at the time that his 'gift' was what enabled him to return to his own body after leaving the containment device. I've looked at the notes Jack, he suffered a massive attack during the attempt to put him back in one piece, so this isn't going to be without risk."

Jack sighed glancing from Owen to Tosh. "Do you think you have enough to go on to make an attempt?"

Both Owen and Tosh nodded.

"OK, what about Patil?, how did he die?"

Owen hadn't realised how stressed he was feeling until this point, he stretched back in his seat. "He died as a result of the car accident, internal bleeding from a slow bleed in his gut, he was on Warfarin which is a drug that thins the blood, complicated by a heart condition. Sod, got what was coming to him. I've had a look at Ianto's orb. His essence, for want of a better word, is being held together by an energy field, which looks amazingly like glass, I imagine it will dissipate when we reinstate him. God knows how it works because we haven't a clue. We're flying a bit blind with this really Jack, we've no idea how the technology works, just what it does."

"How long will you need to get ready?"

Tosh looked to Owen for guidance. "An hour tops."

Jack nodded. "Fine." He turned to Gwen. "How have been going matching the names on Patil's database?"

Gwen slid three sheets of paper across to Jack. "Not including those that died in London. I've tracked down 41 people, all of them in hospitals from around the South East of England, but that's it so far. There are over 200 more people on his list and we have a total of 487 orbs in storage. I also looked into the Retcon thing, as you asked. Owen and I both agree that we cannot Retcon Dr Kelly without risking the health of her baby."

"Thank you. Ok, Gwen, go home be back in first thing tomorrow morning. Owen, Tosh let's see if we can get Ianto sorted."

Gwen looked a little indignant. "Why are you sending me home?"

Jack sighed. "Do you keep have to question everything I ask you to do? I need at least one of you awake and alert in case we have another crisis to deal with. Go home, say hi to your boyfriend and get some rest."

Suitably chastised Gwen rose to her feet. "I just want to be here for Ianto." She replied.

Jack nodded. "I'll make sure he knows that, thank you."

Tosh and Owen were already leaving the boardroom. "What are you going to be doing Jack?" Owen demanded.

"I'm going to try and communicate to Ianto what we are about to do, it may help."

The team dispersed.

Once in the sanctuary of his office, Jack closed the door and leaned against it. He hadn't slept since the ride back from London in the SUV three days before, not that he ever truly slept, but some decent rest wouldn't go amiss. Composing himself he went to the safe and retrieved Ianto's Orb. Carefully cradling it in his hands he sat down at his desk and placed it under the desk light keeping one hand against it to stop it from moving. He looked into the myriad of blues. It was like a storm in a bubble, churning energy and Jack watched it mesmerised as he gently reached out with his thoughts, well his feelings anyway. Comfort and reassurance. Ianto was strangely quiet. The previous times he had held this thing he had a clear sense of the Welshman's conscience, his fear, grief and loneliness.

"Come on Ianto, talk to me now." It was ridiculous to talk, there was.......

"_Hello, sir."_

Jack started with fright, almost knocking the sphere off his desk. "Shit! Ianto!"

"_I would appreciate it if you didn't bounce me around quite so much, it's rather disorientating."_

Jack baulked and then roared with laughter. "You can sense movement?"

"_Yes sir. When Owen was examining me...this thing I'm in. Well vertigo doesn't cover it. Good job I'm in here really otherwise he would have been wearing my last meal."_

Jack was still grinning, it had been a long time since he had conversed with anyone telepathically. "Ianto, how are you feeling?"

"_Not certain, I can explain, disembodied, strangely at peace. I was terrified at first, but I'll be honest I like it in here. The outside world can't touch me. I'm not feeling everything physical. I'd like to think that Lisa is somewhere like this now. I don't have to face anything in here."_

The smile dropped away from Jack's face. "We're going to reinstate to your body."

"_I know, at least I guessed you'd try. I'd rather you didn't. I don't want to face the world again."_

"Well, we want you back, and your sister is here, she wants you back and hell your mother definitely wants you back." Jack insisted.

It was a while before Ianto responded. _"Sir, I know you had to do what you did, with Lisa. I understand that. But in here I don't hurt, I don't want to feel that pain again."_

"I know Ianto."

"_I'll fight it, you try to put me back and I will fight it, if that means dying then so be it."_

"You're acting like a coward. Our pain defines us, makes us better people, we learn and grow from it. You're so young Ianto. Your sister's going to have a baby soon, don't you want to see that happen? Don't you want to meet someone else and fall in love again?"

"_No Jack what I want is some peace and some closure. What I want is to forget the pain and just keep the happy memories that Lisa gave me and in here that is what I have."_

Jack leant forward looking closer into the Orb. "Can you see me looking at you?"

"_Yes sir, in a sense. You're nearer to me now. I hear your worry and your sorrow."_

"I am sorry Ianto, because I let you down. But can't you see that if you stay in there you will not change, you'll just be hanging there, maybe forever, unchanging. Is that really what you want?"

"_I have to admit sir, that I hadn't considered that. I guess you have a unique understanding of the whole forever thing."_

Jack had to smile to himself. "You don't miss a thing do you? How did you know?"

"_I'm not certain, you're are different that's all, in the same way that you smell different to everyone else, you feel different too. I can't explain it very well.....You're going to reinstate me no matter what I say aren't you?"_

"Yes."

"_Right then, I suppose you'd best on with it."_

"You sound resigned."

"_I am, since when have I ever been in control of my life? This is just another choice that's not mine to make regardless of how I feel. You see for me Lisa was the same, no choice Sir, I had to save her."_

"I know, that's why I didn't Retcon your arse or shoot you. I do understand Ianto. I also know I could've handled things better."

"_I'm in no position to judge you, sir."_

"I just hope one day you will forgive me."

"_I think I just did, sir."_


	7. Chapter 7

**THE INNERLIGHT PART 7**

Jack stepped down from his office with Ianto's orb gripped tightly in both hands. He had not been even slightly comforted by the conversation he had had with the younger man. When he entered the autopsy bay Owen, Toshiko and Rhianna were gathered around Ianto's cot finishing off checking that everything was prepared. Jack carefully placed the sphere on a towel on the bench and turned to face the others who were now looking at him expectantly.

Jack gathered his thoughts before speaking. "I managed to explain to Ianto what we are going to do. He asked me not to do it, said he was happier where he is now. I advised him that he would not be given a choice in the matter and he told me that he would fight any attempt to reinstate him. I don't know how he will do that, but we need to be prepared for any eventuality. This is now in your hands. There's nothing more I can do, so unless there are any objections?"

All three of them remained silent.

"OK. You ready?"

"We're ready as we're ever going to be so far as we can tell."

Jack nodded. "Fine, let's do this."

It was no use, he'd been down for almost 20 minutes. Owen and Rhianna had tried everything to bring him back, including breaking four of his ribs with chest compressions. Rhianna stepped back from her brother's body heaving out gut wrenching sobs into Tosh's shoulder. Owen stepped back pulling off his latex gloves and binning them. Jack was stood on the upper level a look of horror on his face and he watched as Tosh escorted a tearful Rhianna from the autopsy bay. Owen glanced at his watch.

"I'm calling it. Time of d....."

Jack flew down the stairs. "No! Keep monitoring him!" He was yelling and Owen took a pace back to get out of his way.

"Jack, he's dead. There's nothing I can do!" Owen protested angrily.

"But I can. Keep monitoring!" Jack leaned over the body of his subordinate. "Now you fucking well wake up this time."

Owen watched in disgust as Jack planted a deeply passionate kiss to Ianto's dead lips and stepped back another pace as yellow light began to emanate from Jack's hands which were currently clamped around Ianto's head.

Oblivious to Owen's startled protests Jack moved his lips over Ianto's and forcing his tongue into his unyielding mouth pouring every ounce of his life's energy into the kiss. The yellow light spread out, enveloping them and Owen, positively terrified backed off against the wall to get out of its way.

The heart monitor started beeping, erratically at first, but then it found a steady rhythm and Ianto thrust his hands against Jack trying to push him away. Their lips parted and Ianto hauled in a painfull first breath and then another, his eyes wild with terror, arms flailing and Jack grabbed them holding them down firmly.

"It's ok Ianto, its ok. I've got you. You're ok."

He was met with inhuman screaming and Ianto struggled violently against him and the restraints that Owen had secured over him earlier on. Jack held on speaking softly reassuringly and keeping his gaze focussed directly into Ianto's panic stricken eyes.

Then Rhianna was there at the other side of the bed, having heard her brother's screams.

"What the hell is going on? He was dead! Oh god Ianto!" At her arrival Ianto froze and sagged back against the exam couch looking up at his sister with raw pain in his eyes.

"Rhi?"

The siblings sank into a tight embrace, Ianto sobbing his heart out. Jack stepped back realising that Owen was giving him an uncomfortable look.

"What the fuck just happened Jack?"

Jack shuddered under his gaze feeling suddenly bone tired. "Check him over. I'll be in my office." He turned and left without further word or looking back.

Jack slumped down behind his desk and scrubbed his hands over his face. No sooner had he done this than there was a tentative knock at the door. Tosh stepped in proffering a mug of coffee and a faint smile.

"It's not up to Ianto's usual standards, but I thought you could do with a drink."

The gratitude in his eyes was heart warming as he held out his hand to take the mug.

"Thank you Tosh."

She sat down, a little nervous, but her over whelming curiosity got the better of her.

"What happened Jack? What did you do?"

Jack gave her a haunted look. "Nothing. Thanks for the coffee Tosh."

Nodding she got up accepting the dismissal without protest.

Sometime later and Owen barged into the room and sank into the same chair that Tosh had used earlier. Jack was uncertain at how much time had passed, the coffee was cold. He met Owen's hard look.

"Care to explain that magic show back there?"

"No. How's Ianto?"

Owen was fuming. "He's sleeping normally, vitals are all in the green."

"Is he lucid?"

"Yes, aside from being rigid with fright when he came round, he knows where he is and who he is." Owen drummed his fingers on his leg. "Jack I want answers, he was dead, should still be dead what the fuck did you do to him, what was that light?"

Jack avoided the medic's intense gaze. "It was me not giving him a choice, that's all you need to know."

Owen spat out a hiss of disgust. "More of your fucking secrets. How the hell do you expect respect and trust from us when you do things like that without explaining them?"

"Right now Owen that is not the issue." Jack snapped back. "Just keep Ianto under observation and when he wakes up come and get me."

Owen lurched to his feet. "You are one arrogant bastard Harkness. You're worse than Ianto with your secrets, hell the two of you should make a fine pair, swap secrets together. What other tricks have you got up your sleeve?"

"Just get out Owen and do as I ask."

"Fine." Owen departed slamming the door behind him.


	8. Chapter 8

**THE INNER LIGHT PART 8**

Ianto Jones hauled in a nervous breath as he stood on his sister's doorstep waiting for the door to open. There was a sinking feeling in his gut. He knew that this meeting would not go well and that she would be angry with him, but the decision had been made. Her husband Peter let him in over the threshold of their overly neat little terraced house. He greeted Ianto with a welcoming grin, pleased to see his young brother-in-law because they had always got on so well.

"She's in the lounge mate. Go on, I'll put the coffee on." He said kindly.

Ianto offered up a faint smile. "Thank's Pete."

Rhianna was stretched out in an arm chair, hands resting on her round baby belly, she moved to get up but Ianto waved her down and came over to kiss her cheek. She pulled him into an embrace with a frown when she realised how skinny he was again.

He stepped back perching on the edge of the couch opposite and he stared at his hands for a moment before speaking.

"How's junior?"

"Kicking, swear to god he's going to be a rugby player." She replied with a smile. "How are you? They finally let you out of that Hub I see."

Ianto fidgeted in his seat. "I'm ok. Owen wanted to be sure there weren't going to be any complications before letting me home."

"So have you handed in your notice yet?" Rhianna searched her brother's face for an answer.

Ianto shrugged non committally. "I er...No I haven't. I've decided to stay there."

Rhianna's face flushed scarlet. "What?"

"I'm not leaving Torchwood Rhi. I can't." He told her. Peter appeared in the doorway and on seeing his wife's face he backed out of the room quietly to give them some privacy.

"What do you mean you can't? Has Harkness threatened you?"

Ianto flinched at her angry tone. "No Rhi, of course not. He isn't like that. I haven't told him yet. I wanted to tell you first."

Rhianna glared at him, weeks of stress and worry glowering at him, rolling off her in great over whelming waves. He had never seen his older sister look so angry.

"Don't you dare. Don't you fucking dare Ianto Jones!"

"Let me expl......"

"No Ianto. After what you have been through since Canary Wharf, what you have put me and Mam through these last few weeks. How could you Ianto? You were all set to finish with them 10 days ago. What's changed?"

Ianto chewed at his lower lip. "Rhi, please don't be mad. I have changed though, don't you see? No one out here understands what I've been through. I can't talk to anyone about my past, about Lisa. I am responsible for the lives of two people Rhi, as if I'd killed them myself. I have to make their deaths count for something. I have to make the deaths of all my friends and Lisa not be a waste."

"Bollocks Ianto! That's just self pity."

Ianto rose to his feet. "It's guilt Rhi. I should be dead two times in as many months but Jack has hauled me back from death, both times I tried to stop him because I wanted to die, still want to die. If I leave Torchwood, what will I do? Work behind some desk in a bank or some random office and not be able to make any kind of a difference. If I stay with Torchwood, I can. I won't feel so utterly useless and maybe in time I won't feel so guilty either." He was pacing about the lounge.

Rhianna was out of her chair and standing at his side holding on to his arm to still him.

"The rest of the world is not your responsibility."

"But you, mam, Pete and that baby are. There's only the five of us. The stuff that comes through that rift can be so deadly, I know and if I can protect you from that."

"Ianto, stop this. You are not some comic book action hero...."

He glared at her. "You're right I'm not and neither was Lisa or Mike or Sandra and all the others I worked with. I can't turn my back on this knowing the things that I know. I need to be able to do this."

"To salve your conscience?"

The look she received from him made her baulk. "Yes Rhi, amongst other things. Please understand."

Rhianna stepped back and folded her arms in a gesture unnervingly similar to Jack's. "I'm sorry but I don't. All I see is your suffering and me and Mam sitting around waiting for that phone call. That nearly killed her last week, I've had Mam crying on the phone to me every day since the accident."

"I know and I'm sorry."

"You go back to them Ianto and I will never speak to you again." Rhianna's tone was resolute.

Ianto gaped at her taking a moment to digest what she had just said. "Rhianna, please."

"I mean it Ianto. I can't deal with this anymore, you're bloody secrets and lies and seeing you hurt so much."

Ianto nodded meeting her eyes with an empty look which made her blanch. "Fine. I'll see myself out then."

Rhianna blinked back her tears as her brother slammed the front door shut behind him.

He still couldn't face looking into the mirror, so what if it meant his tie wasn't knotted quite right, tough. Ianto brushed his teeth and once done went back to his bedroom and pulled on his waistecoat and suit Jacket. He'd had to get most of them altered because of the weight loss. Jack didn't seem to mind, he'd already got back into the habit of throwing inappropriate comments his way every time Ianto stepped into his office with a mug of coffee or a report folder. Ianto didn't much care anymore. He buried himself in his work and started clocking up between 18 and 20 hours a day every day. Ianto half wondered whether it was a self imposed penance or the fact that he was so lonely he couldn't stand to be in his own empty flat for than a couple of hours at a time. The rest of the team seemed to carry on as normal, Owen with his bitchiness, Gwen with her over sized heart and Tosh with her quiet and sensitive compassion. Unbeknown to him Jack watched and worried. Ianto had not explained his reasons for deciding to come back to work. He just did getting on with every task thrown at him in dignified and unnerving silence, but after two weeks Jack decided to speak to the youngest member of his team. Owen had nagged at him saying that the boy needed to slow up and that Jack should try talking to him. So at 11pm one Tuesday night he called Ianto up to his office and ordered him to sit down.

Jack sat behind his desk fiddling with a fountain pen and giving Ianto an appraising look.

"Why are you still here?"

Ianto narrowed his tired eyes. "There's quite a back log of reports to get through, sir."

Jack watched as the younger man rested his long hands in his lap his movements controlled almost painfully so.

"That's not what I meant. I offered you a choice. You're still here, why?"

"Do you want me to leave?"

Jack sucked in an exasperated breath. "No. I just want to know why you stayed. You wanted to watch me suffer and die two months ago. I disregarded your wishes and got you out of that jar. I'm just surprised you are still here."

"Believe me sir I really wish I wasn't." Ianto responded

"So tell me."

Their eyes met and Jack really wished they hadn't when he saw nothing but emptiness staring back at him.

"I've no where else to go, sir. I have a debt to pay."

"To whom?"

"To Annie and Dr Tanizaki and to myself." Ianto got to his feet. "Unless there is anything else, sir?"

Jack sighed. "Sit. I haven't said you can go yet."

Ianto complied.

"We have to get past this mess Ianto, you and I. I thought we'd made some progress, but I was obviously wrong about that."

Ianto shifted uncomfortably. "You weren't wrong sir. I'm not angry with you. I know what you did was for the right reasons. I just have a lot of things I need to figure out."

"Have you spoken to your sister?"

Ianto shuddered and shook his head, the first evidence that he was losing a measure of his rigid self control. "No sir."

Jack offered up a kindly smile. "It might help, talking to someone."

"My family are refusing to speak to me. They didn't want me coming back here."

Jack's smile dropped. "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault, it was my choice." It was the hardest thing not to cry and Ianto got to his feet again, desperate to get away.

Jack got up too and walked around his desk knowing his next move could easily earn him a punch on the jaw. Cautiously he grasped Ianto by the arm and pulled him close gently encircling him in an embrace. Ianto went rigid at the contact, but Jack held him anyway cradling his head against his shoulder until finally the younger man sagged against him and cried, his fingers curling tightly into the fabric of Jack's shirt. Jack tightened his hold thinking that maybe at last things would start to heal between them.

_Finis_

AN: Not sure if this is such a good way to end it but I've always felt that Torchwood came with a price and usually it's family! Thank you for your reading and reviews.....


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